Bear This! (A 300 Moons Book) Read online

  “I mean disappear, in the biblical sense,” Darcy said.

  “I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that,” Kate said from her place on the stepladder.

  “You’d have done the same, Mom, and you know it,” Darcy scolded.

  “It’s true,” Kate said sadly, contemplating a tiny angel ornament. “I would have killed him in a heartbeat for trying to harm my grandson.”

  “Well, thankfully Finn didn’t have to kill anybody,” Darcy said cheerfully. “He just made him disappear. Permanently.”

  Evangeline shook her head, then decided against asking follow-up questions. She’d work it out in time.

  “So, I guess I’m safe then,” she ventured.

  “Looks that way,” Darcy nodded.

  “Wish I could say the same for Ethan,” Derek said darkly.

  “For god’s sake, man,” Ethan said suddenly. “What the hell? You know I’ve always liked her.”

  “She’s my sister,” Derek shrugged.

  “Well she’s going to be my wife, so you need to get used to it,” Ethan retorted.

  “I don’t see a ring on her finger,” Derek muttered.

  “Babe, want to go to the jewelry store tomorrow?” Ethan turned to Evangeline.

  “Oh, wait for Will. He’ll want to go with you,” Kate put in before Evangeline could answer.

  “Go with who? Where?” Will’s voice came from the kitchen door.

  “With Ethan, to the jewelry store,” Kate said.

  “Oh, man, I was just there yesterday,” Will said. “Look what I got for Tess.”

  He opened a velvet box to show off a small diamond on a delicate band.

  “Aww, Will,” Darcy said, shoving him benevolently.

  “She’s going to love that,” Derek told him.

  “I should buy stock in that place,” Kate shook her head ruefully. “My kids are going to make Rachel DelGato a rich woman.”

  “You ready for me to buy you a ring?” Ethan asked Evangeline quietly.

  She looked into his blue eyes, stalling a bit.

  “Something wrong?” he asked, worried.

  “Seems like we’re moving kind of fast, doesn’t it?” she asked, hating herself for not being ready to accept the commitment he offered so selflessly.

  She held her breath, waiting for his gorgeous features to be marred by hurt or anger. But that wasn’t the Ethan Chambers way.

  “Oh, I see how it is,” he grinned. “You want convincing, don’t you?”

  “No,” she said, mortified, “not at all, I just—”

  “You want flowers and candy,” he continued thoughtfully.

  “No, I don’t—”

  “Yup, playing hard to get,” he nodded sagely to himself.

  “No,” she said in a serious tone. “Ethan, I just don’t want you to feel trapped.”

  He stopped teasing her then and looked into her eyes, shaking his head in wonder.

  “Oh, it’s too late for that. You had me trapped seven years ago, sweet girl.”

  Evangeline blushed so hard she could hear the blood rushing in her ears.

  “Kate,” a familiar voice called from the back door.

  “Gloria,” Kate yelled happily. “Come on in!”

  “Mrs. Cortez,” Ethan said politely, rising. Evangeline stood with him to greet the older woman.

  “Evangeline, I’m so glad you’re home again.” Gloria smiled, pulling Evangeline into a surprisingly tight hug for such a tiny woman. “And, Ethan, honey, there you are,” Gloria cried. “I stopped by the firehouse with a meal for you, but Dylan said he saw you running off through the snow without your coat.”

  “I guess I’d better get back there,” Ethan said ruefully. “But I wanted to thank you.”

  “For what, dear?” Gloria asked.

  “Your husband’s old halligan,” he said. “I think… I think it saved us.”

  “I told you it had magic in it when I gave it to you, Ethan,” she told him solemnly. “It will always keep you safe.”

  “I believed you when you told me,” he admitted. “Though I thought you meant it had sentimental value. Now I know you don’t use the word magic lightly.”

  Gloria met his eye quickly, assessing him. Whatever she saw met with her approval.

  “I’m glad you had it when you needed it. Don’t get caught without it, son.”

  “No ma’am,” he replied. “I’m sure I won’t.”

  “Wait,” Derek chimed in “Did you really kill a shadow demon with that old thing? I always knew you were crazy, bro, but that is like a whole new level.”

  “I had to protect Evangeline,” he said matter of factly. “And I don’t think we killed it, only chased it away.”

  “It’s dead,” Evangeline told them, remembering her feeling from last night. “Although I’m not really sure how.”

  “Did it happen to look like a giant bird by any chance?” Will asked, coming in from the kitchen.

  “Yes,” Ethan and Evangeline said at the same time.

  How could he possibly know that?

  “That would be the one that Tess blew to smithereens last night,” Will said. “You’re right. It’s dead.”

  “Tess?” Ethan asked.

  “It’s a long story,” Will said. “I’ll tell you all about it sometime. Are you sticking around?”

  Evangeline had a feeling they all had some serious catching up to do.

  “Actually,” Ethan said, turning back to Evangeline, “I really do need to go back to town and watch the station. Plus there are repairs to get started. You probably want to stay with the family. I’ll be back here for you in the morning when Donna Kennedy comes in.”

  “No,” Evangeline exclaimed way too loudly. She looked around at all the stunned faces. “I mean, I, um, want to help you with the chili.”

  “Chili’s not the only hot thing happening at the firehouse,” Darcy muttered to Will.

  “Darcy,” Kate exclaimed as Will tried to swallow his laugh and ended up making a sound almost like a hiccup.

  “We’ll see you guys tomorrow,” Ethan said, grabbing Evangeline’s hand and dragging her out of the room before she could get any more embarrassed.

  “Hang on, guys,” Darcy said. “I’ll give you a ride.”

  Evangeline had forgotten they’d both traveled to the farm on foot. She’d been a bear, of course, but Ethan must’ve run the whole way through the deep snow with only his nearly useless human feet.

  “Thanks,” Ethan told Darcy.

  “No sweat.” She shrugged. “I wanted to talk to Evangeline anyway.”

  Outside, the snow was melting quickly under the bright Christmas sun. But the branches of the sycamores were still frosted with a few inches of gleaming white.

  Darcy jogged ahead of them toward a green station wagon.

  “Wow, a station wagon?” Evangeline teased. “You always said you were buying a motorcycle the minute you turned eighteen.”

  Darcy laughed her low, beautiful laugh that always reminded Evangeline of Kate. “I did. But I’ve got a different lifestyle now.”

  She hopped into the driver’s seat.

  Ethan squeezed Evangeline’s hand and smiled down at her. Then he leaned over to open the car door.

  She slid into the passenger’s seat and he got in the back. They all clicked their seat belts, then Darcy turned the key.

  An old blues ballad blasted on immediately. Darcy turned it down.

  “I guess some things never change,” Evangeline laughed.

  “Hey, I’ve got to educate the kid,” Darcy said, raising an eyebrow.

  “What’s it like?” Evangeline asked. She was really curious. Parenthood seemed to agree with Darcy.

  “It’s awesome,” Darcy said immediately. “And it’s really hard. I wanted to talk to you, Eva. Did you ever meet Luke at the compound?”

  A lump formed in Evangeline’s throat. She shook her head.

  “We didn’t really get to interact much with the younger ones,” she explai
ned quietly.

  “Luke is still shy, but he’s really coming out of his shell,” Darcy said with obvious pride in her voice. “I know you probably don’t want to talk about it right now, but when you get settled, I’d like to know…”

  Evangeline knew what Darcy didn’t want to ask.

  For the the first time ever, Evangeline told her story.

  21

  “It was like a dormitory,” Evangeline began, looking out the window and trying to let the snowy trees calm her. “It was clean and warm most of the time. They gave us food, though it never seemed like enough and we had to earn it. They gave us books to read sometimes.”

  She snuck a look at Darcy. Her foster sister had her eyes planted on the road ahead, but her mouth formed a tight line. It wouldn’t make her feel good to hear the truth. But she was his mother, she wanted to know.

  “I can only tell you what happened to me. I don’t know what happened to the younger ones. But they would come and get me every day for a session, each of us older kids. That meant being forced to shift back and forth, sometimes they would use a collar to shock me to make it happen. They would make me exercise to the point of… well, exhaustion - as a bear, then as a woman, then as a bear, and on and on. If I satisfied them, they fed me. If I didn’t, they hurt me. But never enough to prevent another session the next day.”

  In the back seat Ethan hissed in a breath.

  Well, he could handle it or he couldn’t. If he was going to run, now was the time. She was grateful to Darcy in a way for forcing this confession.

  “Then one day they took one of the boys for his session and he didn’t come back sweaty and exhausted. He had a haunted look in his eyes and he wouldn’t speak. They watched us all the time, so we couldn’t really talk anyway. They took another boy and another, and another. All of them came back shaken. Then they took me,” she stopped a moment, trying to find the strength to continue. The story was humiliating and she’d been so terrified, she never wanted to relive it.

  Ethan reached an arm around the seat to embrace her.

  “You don’t have to talk about it,” Darcy said quickly.

  “They took my clothes and put me in a hospital gown. I had to lie on a metal table. When they tried to spread my legs apart, I went crazy. Four of them held me down, and they used the shock collar to stop me from shifting.

  “The head scientist came in with Sharp, she was smiling that horrible smile. And she watched. She watched him stick that plastic thing inside me and inject me with the sperm that was in it.

  “It hurt so much going in, and then it was done. I cried so hard I lost my voice. It was freezing cold and my stomach was cramping. They held me down another hour, then they dressed me, and brought me back to the dorms.”

  Darcy’s knuckles were white on the steering wheel.

  Ethan’s hand spread out warm across Evangeline’s chest. “I love you,” he whispered.

  “I knew I could never let a child be born into that place,” she went on, refusing to cry, to dwell. “So my determination to escape finally reached a point where I was willing to risk anything, even my own life to get out. And I got a lucky break. And here I am. And my kid is going to live free. And so is yours, right, Darcy?”

  “Yeah, he sure is,” Darcy smiled through tears.

  “He sure is,” Evangeline echoed.

  She was relieved, so relieved that the others had gotten out. It had been a point of horrible guilt all these weeks free, knowing that the others were still trapped. She’d had a vague idea of finding a way to get them out once she got to Kate. But it was a relief to know at least that battle wasn’t in front of her anymore.

  No more hell, only heaven.

  They pulled up at the firehouse.

  The little town was so bright and pretty, Evangeline almost couldn’t believe it was real. Icicle lights hung from the Tudor facades of the little shops, and real icicles hung from the grooves and gutters. Twinkling lights and garlands wrapped around each lamppost. Even though it was Christmas Day, families were out walking in the village, kids carrying their sleds to the big hill on the college campus.

  “Ready?” Ethan asked her.

  “Yeah,” she smiled.

  “See you kids later,” Darcy said with her pirate grin.

  They stood in front of the firehouse watching the green station wagon disappear. Then Ethan pulled Evangeline close to his chest.

  “I’m so sorry for what happened to you,” he murmured into her hair. His breath was warm, and his big body made her feel so safe and loved.

  “I’m not anymore,” she said suddenly. “It got me here.”

  “It got both of you here,” he squeezed her tighter still and her heart sang with the knowledge that this time he meant both herself and the baby.

  22

  Ethan led Evangeline into the firehouse.

  Something about her terrible story had filled him with a desperate need to claim her that went beyond physical desire. It was instinctive, as if her bear had reflected some of her ancient wisdom on him. He ached to bring her into his bed, cover her body with his own, join their flesh as their spirits were already joined, so that he could lose this feeling of unbalance.

  But he knew she must be feeling pensive and vulnerable after reliving her experience. He would be patient.

  “Want to decorate the tree with me?” he offered.

  She smiled and nodded, so he dragged one of the bins into the center of the lounge and opened it up.

  Inside, the parts of the artificial Christmas tree waited, looking most un-magical. He pulled them out and together they began assembling the base and snapping in the branches.

  “Too bad we don’t have any Christmas music,” Evangeline said.

  “Oh, hang on,” he laughed and strode over to the desk.

  Next to the scanner sat an ancient radio. He turned it on and sure enough, Christmas music greeted him immediately. The sound was a bit tinny, but he was so happy today, even the static sounded like a symphony.

  Evangeline began to croon along with Elvis as she straightened and shaped the smaller pieces of each branch.

  Ethan smiled at her encouragingly, but didn’t move to join her again. He was doing what he had so often done before in her presence, trying to memorize everything about her - the husky sound of her sweet voice, the small dimple in one cheek when she smiled, the way the sunlight from the windows played on the highlights in her dark hair. It was too much - he could never catalogue it all.

  “Come on,” she said. “Sing with me!”

  “In a minute, babe,” he told her. “I’m going to let Dylan know we’re back.”

  He grabbed the phone from the desk and called the police station. Then he called the chief and got voicemail.

  “Hey, it’s Ethan. Merry Christmas,” he said into the recording. “I’ve got a surprise for you. Make sure you come by the fundraiser a little early.”

  Evangeline’s eyes got big and she put a hand over her mouth to quiet her delighted giggles.

  “You forgot, didn’t you?” Ethan asked.

  She nodded.

  “How could you forget one and a half million dollars in gold?”

  “I have something more precious,” she said, looking down at her hands.

  That was it. Done, he was done, he couldn’t wait any more.

  Ethan crossed the room in two steps and swept her up in his arms.

  “Ethan,” she giggled, but he was dead serious.

  “I need to hold you,” he told her gruffly, carrying her up to the bunkroom.

  It was still chilly but the wind wasn’t flapping the blanket that covered the window anymore. And besides, he was going to keep her very warm.

  Evangeline had quieted on the way up the stairs. She wasn’t unhappy though, he could read her subdued excitement as if they shared a heart. She was feeling the way he was, reverent, grateful.

  He found a blanket and slid the edges under the mattress in the bunk above the one they’d slept in, so that it m
ade a sort of canopy.

  “Hey, a tent,” Evangeline smiled.

  God, the tents and tree forts he and Derek had made all over Harkness Farm when they were all kids.

  He held up one end of the blanket and she crawled in.

  Then he followed her.

  Inside the bunk it was cozy and dim. Evangeline studied him with solemn eyes. She looked so young, so soft in the oversized fire department sweats. Ethan wished he could freeze time for her, to allow her all the days she needed to find herself as a free woman before she became a mother.

  But somehow it was right that she had this responsibility. She was so strong, so resilient. And she loved to work hard. No doubt about it, taking care of a baby would be hard work.

  And Ethan couldn’t wait to share the work with her. His loneliness was over. He was whole now.

  He held onto the moment, memorizing the shape of the space between them, the gentle rise of her chest as she breathed. He hardly knew where to begin.

  As if sensing his hesitation, Evangeline flowed into his arms. Her small breasts flattened against his chest, her leg wrapped around his hip.

  “Ethan, please, I need you,” she whispered, her hot breath tickling his ear and her words sending him off the cliff of restrained emotion, and into a wild desire.

  The blood pounded in his ears and he had to resist the impulse to rip her clothes from her body and take her with the desperate violence that had his own body captive.

  He took her face in his hands and she pulled back a little to look at him with luminous eyes.

  “I love you, Evangeline,” he told her. “I always will.”

  She smiled so hard the apples of her cheeks made perfect circles.

  “I love you too, Ethan.”

  The words sounded like church bells. He studied her sweet lips and imagined them all over his body.

  She gasped a little as if she had heard his thought, and when he met her eyes again they were slightly amber, as if her animal side were hungry.

  “Ethan,” she whispered.

  Then his body took over and he was pinning her to the bed and covering her face with kisses.

  She whimpered and squirmed beneath him as if she were as desperate to have him inside her as he was to be there.